The State of a Cheated Nation Address

My cheated people, my happy co-cheaters, it has been more than 7 fast years that passed and we're now reaping the economic boom that I promised to my lord who put me here, a cheating presidency. Economic boom to those who are here present bodily as well as in spirit for aren't thou art my co-cheats running this country. We would not stop we'll stay more focused on the economy. It was fast fast 7 years indeed. Many fast bucks had been made. Manny, hi Manny, palakpakin natin si Manny, he made so many fast bucks because of his fast very fast fists. Like ours, for we could never cheat without our fast hands. We're 7 steps ahead of our astoundingly astonished wannabe oppositions. Come 2010, this cheating presidency will be changed to a cheating parliament. There's no stopping the fast march to 1st World status by 2020. Well, we all cheaters should have gone to other 1st World countries by then. We leave this country to other cheaters. My lord says it so, this country is cursed. Imagine me a Spanish royalty running it. Some people get all the luck. I cannot wait to settle down in my motherland. I am done with this charade but yes you know I'm enjoying every minute of it like my papa and tito ferdie and other cheats before me. The pinoy bull is down on its broken legs and my last thrusts of the sword will surely put an end to its suffering. Join me my co-cheaters to finish this extra-patient fool's agony. Focus lang tayo sa economy. Ha, ha, ha, ha, !!!!! till next year. Mga ungas.